5/31/2015

Time Travel To The Future

Anytime you need to be happier, just do some time travel. It’s that simple.

I know what you’re thinking: He’s finally gone insane.
No, I’m not crazy. And you don’t need a time machine. You’re just going to use your imagination.
But scientific research shows this is a great way to immediately increase happiness. You can do it anywhere and it doesn’t cost anything.
Research shows happiness is all about where you put your attention. And shifting your attention to the past, the future or even the present — can boost happiness.
Still sound silly? Stay with me. You do unhappy time travel all too frequently.
When you are overcome with regret, you’re turning your attention to negative elements of the past. When you worry, you’re thinking about an unpleasant future. But we can also use mental time travel to get the best out of life.
Here are three ways, why they work, and quick tips to use them to put a smile on your face.

1) Time Travel To The Future!

It’s as simple as anticipation. Remember being a kid and looking forward to holiday gifts? Or as an adult haven’t you fantasized about that vacation coming up?
Well, research says deliberately using anticipation is an insanely powerful way to get happy.
How does it work?
Here’s why you absolutely need to incorporate more anticipation into your life:
Studies show anticipation can actually be more enjoyable than getting the thing you’re anticipating.
...(read more)

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3/15/2015

This will make you happy !

This will make you happy !

 

1) Take Recess


Most of what we do all day is "instrumental." What's that mean? It gets something done. It's practical. It achieves a goal.

But these days we seem to be doing more and more that's instrumental and a lot less that's just fun.

2) Switch Autopilot On


You spend 40% of the day on autopilot, engaging in habits, not actual decisions.

3) Unshackle Yourself


Do less.

Really, you can

4) Cultivate Relationships


Christine pulls a quote I love from the wonderful book Triumphs of Experience:

...there are two pillars of happiness revealed by the seventy-five-year-old Grant Study…. One is love. The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away.



5) Tolerate Some Discomfort


Many of us come home from work and think, "I just want to sit down and do nothing."

And that's understandable if you're overworked and burned out. But "doing nothing" is really not what will make you happier

(Read more)


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2/01/2015

Buy Happiness !


How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy

While true happiness may be something that can only be found in the heart, there are plenty of arguments that say money can actually buy you
some happiness here and there. Here are some of the ways experts say it's possible to write a check and make it out to your happiness. 
It's certainly hard to measure happiness, of course. There's no point system or way to accurately measure the happiness flowing through your
bloodstream, and happiness is an emotion that can mean different things for different people, so keep that in mind as you read on. That said,
buying happiness all comes down to how you spend your money. It could be a new album from your favorite artist, a trip to somewhere you've
longed to travel to, or just a cold beer at the end of a long day. This guide won't unlock the secret to true happiness in your life—whatever
that may entail for you—but it will provide some ideas on how to get the most from your your hard-earned money.
Buy Your Financial Security


How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy

Stress is the enemy of happiness, and feeling insecure in your finances can be a major stressor. Over time it even begins to affect your
health in a negative way, which obviously is bad for your happiness. Instead of living in worry about your debts and loans, you can start to
buy your happiness back by paying them off.
     
               
The next time you feel like you have some extra cash to splurge with, see how much of your savings you can put toward your debt instead. It
takes time to whittle away things like credit card debt, but when you finally overcome it, you'll feel way happier overall. Besides, when
push comes to shove, paying off your credit cards is literally the best financial return for your money.
Cash In on Experiences
How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy
Some purchased items can make you happy, yes, but you've probably heard that the best use of money is buying experiences instead. Our life is
built around our experiences and the memory of a great vacation will stick with us a lot longer than a new smartphone. Experiences also have
the perk of shaping who you are. You could learn a lot about yourself—and what you really want in life—when you opt for an awesome experience
instead of a new TV that would just keep you glued to your couch.
 Spending on Experiences Instead of Possessions Results in More Satisfaction    



In a survey conducted by Harvard University psychology professor and Stumbling on Happiness author Dan Gilbert, a majority of respondents—
57%— reported greater happiness from experiential purchases. Only 34% of respondents said that material goods brought them happiness. Gilbert
and his colleagues also found that the type of experience wasn't that important:

But when it comes to happiness, the nature of the activity in which people are engaged seems to matter less than the fact that they are
engaged in it… people were maximally happy when they were thinking about what they were doing, and time-lag analyses revealed that
mindwandering was a cause, and not merely an effect, of diminished happiness. A wandering mind is an unhappy mind, and one of the benefits of
experiences is that they keep us focused on the here and now.
Maintaining presence, the practice of focusing on the here and now, has long been touted as a great method of maintaining happiness.
Experiences make that easy, especially if it's something you've never done before. How could you not be in the moment if you're experiencing
something brand new? As explained by Elizabeth Dunn, associate professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia—and co-author of
Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending—change is a huge part of buying happiness. In her research, she found that buying big things
like a house didn't make people any happier:

This was one of the most surprising findings I came across. It's quite striking that what so many of us are pouring our incomes into turns
out not to have that big an impact on happiness. The human happiness system is fundamentally attuned to change and houses are very stable. 
So if you want an easy boost to your happiness, you need to get out in the world and do some new things. But you don't have to do it alone!
In fact, it might even be better for you to buy experiences with others. Being social makes us happy, and investing in experiences that you
can talk about later with others is a great way to do that. You get the benefits of a new experience, as well as the perks of feeling like
you were involved in something special later on. Think of something of you've always wanted to do and get some friends or family involved. If
you can, plan multiple things far ahead, so you can build the anticipation (which can help you enjoy it even more).
Make It Rain for Others 

When you think of buying happiness, you probably think of spending money on yourself. That's perfectly normal, but there's a strong case for
spending money on others to create happiness. Sometimes seeing someone else's smile can do more for you than making yourself smile.
In the TED talk above, social science researcher Michael  orton describes an experiment he conducted in Canada in which people were given
money and asked to spend a certain amount of money each day. Some were told to buy things for themselves and others were told to buy things
for others. When it was all said and done, the group that was told buy things for others reported feeling much happier. Of course, this was
in a first world country and performed with a sample of fairly wealthy undergrads. They ran the same experiment in Uganda, where things are a
little different, and got similar results, with the group who bought things for others reporting more happiness. Of course, if you can't buy
something for others, or donate money, volunteering is a great way to buy your happiness with a different kind of currency—your time.

Spending money on others doesn't have to mean buying them trinkets and trivets, either. Think of a way to invest in others as if they were a
stock or bond. Instead of money, you know that you're going to get a great return rate on happiness. Know a painter that's short on cash? Buy
them some canvases and feel the joy when you see them become beautiful paintings. Have a niece or nephew that's learning to read? Buy them a
collection of books and try not to smile when they read them out loud to you. Sure, you could just toss some money at someone, but finding a
way to invest in what they love will make a huge difference for both of you.
Buy the Right Kind of Material Goods 
How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy
There's nothing wrong with buying a material item, but there are some ways to increase the chance that it will actually make you happy. You
might get sudden rush of excitement when you buy something expensive, but nothing kills your happiness faster than a big wave of buyer's
remorse.
First of all, spend your money where you spend your time. It might seem obvious, but spending money on things that you actually use will make
you much happier. Yet people often fail to consider "the comfort principle." For example, if you spend a ton of time sitting in a desk chair,
you'll be pretty happy buying a new chair that's insanely comfortable—even if it doesn't seem like a "fun" purchase. On the other hand, if
you rarely go for a bike ride, an overly-expensive bicycle will just feel like a pricey item in your garage, which certainly won't make you
happy.

When we first talked about the comfort principle, we came up with a generic list that holds up pretty well:
·8 hours: (Work) Office chair, computer, office desk, monitor
·2 hours: (Commute) Car, car stuff
·1 hour: (Cooking) Kitchen utensils
·3 hours: (Living room recreation) TV, video games, music
·1 hour: (Reading) Kindle/iPad
·1 hour: (Exercise) Running, treadmill, elliptical
Make a list of your own and really think about what you spend your time doing. Be careful about trying to trick yourself into doing things,
too. You might think that buying an expensive treadmill will get you to run more, but there's a good chance it will just become something
that sits in the guest room. Stick to "experiential items" whenever you can. Just like with buying experiences, experiential items offer you
excitement and joy over extended periods of time. A good book that you'll enjoy reading over and over, or even a video game that gives hours
of entertainment are good examples of these.

 Materialism May  not Be All Bad, if You Purchase "Experiential" Items    

If you're going to splurge on things, it's best to only splurge on inexpensive things. When you buy a bunch of expensive things, they seem
exciting and special for a little while, only to lose their luster. Same goes for inexpensive things, but you spend a heck of a lot less
them. So go ahead, splurge a little and feel that happiness surge. Just do it with things that don't cost you an arm and a leg so you have
some limbs left when the magic's gone.
Lastly, make sure you don't overdo it. Trying to buy too many things will take away the excitement of buying something. Abundance is the
enemy of appreciation, and getting yourself a treat loses a lot of its power when you take it too far.
Buy Yourself More Time 
How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy
It may not seem like it some days, but time is even more limited than money. If that's the case for you, you can take the money you already
have and buy more time in a couple different ways. For example, our own Adam Pash found that he was much happier after hiring a house
cleaner. It freed up his time and he didn't have to argue about cleanliness with his wife. Imagine what you could do with the amount time you
spend cleaning now.

 When Money Can Buy Happiness, Use It    


Of course, it doesn't have to be a house cleaner. It can be anything that frees up time. Services like Amazon Prime Pantry or Yummy.com can
do your grocery shopping for you, or a nanny or babysitter can watch the kids a couple times a week. When you have more time to do the things
you want to do, you'll be much happier. It's not always cheap for these kinds of things, but if you use that extra time well, it may be well
worth the price.
Beware of the Pitfalls 


How to Buy Happiness: The Purchases Most Likely to Bring You Joy

As you open your wallet for all of these potential happiness boosters, it's important to stay aware of the downsides. First, manage your
expectations.  obody—including the experts—believes that you can become happy just through buying things. Experiences, time, and material
goods can only go so far. Inner peace, love, and overall contentedness can't be bought with any amount of money.
Second, be sure to buy what you like.  ot what others like. Following the herd can sometimes make you feel like a part of the group, but in
the long run you'll be spending money on things you never actually wanted to buy in the first place. In those instances, you might be better
off looking for a herd that fits your likes a little more.
Third, as you make more money, avoid spending more money. This is called "lifestyle inflation", and it can make it seem like you never got a
raise to begin with. Spending more money on the things you used to spend less on won't make you any happier. Remember the things that made
you happy before your bump in earnings and tell yourself that it doesn't have to change.2

 Avoid "Lifestyle Inflation" When You Get a  ew Job to Keep Your Finances in Check    


With those things in mind, go forth and find some fun things to do, some people to invest in, and some items that will give you some real
bang for your buck. Is money the key to happiness?  o, so don't ever believe it is. But money is a part of our lives and you might as well
use it for things that make the work day worth it.

One more thing: happiness is not a place you reach and rest at. Instead, imagine it like a garden, as it takes constant upkeep and care. As
soon as you stop watering and pulling weeds, it can go away. So while it may be true that money can't make you perpetually happy, it can
certainly be a quick watering that your plants so desperately need every now and again.

(Lifehacker.com)

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12/27/2014

Things about how to be happy

Things about how to be happy


  1. Start learning to be more human again. – Gadgets are great, but they can get in the way if you aren’t careful.  Control them so they don’t control you.  In other words, put down the phone.  Don’t avoid eye contact.  Don’t hide behind a screen.  Ask about people’s stories.  Listen.  And smile together.
  2. Start filtering out the noise in your life. – Be careful about who you give the microphone and stage to in your life.  Don’t just listen to the loudest voice.  Listen to the truest one.
  3. Start choosing differently, for your own well-being. – A big part of your life is a result of the little choices you make every day.  If you don’t like some part of your life, it’s time to start tweaking things and making better choices, right now, right where you are.
  4. Start being way more productive than you are busy. – There’s a big difference between being busy and being productive.  Don’t confuse motion and progress.  A rocking horse keeps moving but never makes any forward progress.  In other words…
  5. Start dedicating time every day to meaningful activities. – What you do every day matters, but WHY you do what you do matters even more.  So quit doing just what you’re able to do; figure out what you were made to do, and then do more of it.  And if you only have fifteen minutes a day to spare, no problem – make those fifteen minutes meaningful.
  6. Start being present. – If your mind carries a heavy burden from the past, you will experience more of the same.  Let it go.  And also be careful not to dwell so much on creating your perfect future life that you forget to live today.  Be here now and make the most of it.  (Read The Untethered Soul.)
  7. Start replacing your worries with positive actions. – Most of the things I’ve worried about didn’t happen.  Most of the things I’ve hoped for and worked hard for did.  The same is true for the happiest and most successful people I’ve talked to and worked with over the years.  So keep dreaming and keep DOING.
  8. Start running toward things, not away from them. – The best way to move away from something negative is to move toward something positive.
  9. Start letting your love overpower your fear. – There are only two energies at the core of the human experience: Love and Fear.  Fear pushes what you want away from you.  Love draws it in.
  10. Start doing what’s right, even if it’s not the easiest option. – Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.  Just because it’s easy, doesn’t mean it’s worth your while.  Do what’s right, not what’s easiest right now.  It’s a less stressful and regretful way to live in the long run.
  11. Start comparing yourself to yourself, and no one else. – Forget what others have and where they are.  You’re not walking in their shoes, and you’ll never comfortably walk in your own if you keep comparing yourself to them.  So focus on what’s best for YOU and your unique circumstances.  What do you need to do next for your own objectives?  Do it!  You won’t be distracted by comparison if you’re captivated with purpose.
  12. Start genuinely being happy for others. – The more beauty you find in someone else’s journey, the less you’ll want to compare it to your own.
  13. Start being more tolerant of those who see things differently. – Remember, love and kindness begets love and kindness.  The way we love people we disagree with is the best evidence of what we really believe about ourselves.
  14. Start letting grace have the last word. – We’ll only lose the arguments our pride insists on winning.  When it’s more important to win arguments than love people, we need to start all over again with our faith and priorities.
  15. Start giving without expectations. – You will end up very disappointed if you expect people will always do for you as you do for them. Not everyone has the same heart as you.  Which is why you sometimes must give twice as much without expectations to eventually get something better than you ever imagined.  It’s about the long-term, big picture.  The fact that you can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another’s, smile at someone and give them hope, is proof that generosity works wonders behind the scenes.  So…
  16. Start being the difference you want to see in the world. – Honestly, you were born with the ability to change someone’s life.  Don’t ever waste it.  Be kind.  Be present.  Be someone who makes a difference.  What you give to another person is really what you give to yourself.  When you treat others with love, you learn that you are lovable too.
  17. Start making your “relationship wealth” a top priority. – People who spend all their time trying to make money, spend all their money trying to make time.  Don’t do this to yourself.  Put first things first.  Be wealthy in good friendships and family time from the get-go.  (Read The Happiness Project.)
  18. Start SHOWING your loved ones what they mean to you. – Our closest relationships are vital to our happiness.  As we tell those we love that we love them, we must never forget that the highest compliment is not to utter words, but to live by them.
  19. Start being grateful for the life that is yours. – Gratitude is simply the awareness of what’s good.  Count your blessings, no matter how small, and start with the breath you’re taking now.
  20. Start replacing the phrase “I have to” with “I get to” whenever you catch yourself starting to complain. – So many activities we complain about are things others wish they had the chance to do.
  21. Start opening up to new growth opportunities. – In almost every situation, a little more willingness to acknowledge that there may be something you do not know could change everything.  Go somewhere new, and countless opportunities suddenly appear.  Do something differently, and all sorts of great new possibilities spring up.  Keep an open mind and have fun with life.
  22. Start letting little frustrations go as soon as they arrive. – You can’t let one bad moment spoil a bunch of good ones.  Don’t let the silly little dramas of each day get you down.  Happiness starts on the inside.  You control your thoughts about everything.  Meaning, the only person who can hurt your happiness in the long run is YOU.
  23. Start focusing only on what you can control. – Never force anything.  Give it your best shot and then let it be.  If it’s meant to be, it will be.  Don’t hold yourself down with things you can’t control.
  24. Start turning the pages that need to be turned. – No book is just one chapter.  No chapter tells the whole story.  No mistake defines who we are.  Keep turning the pages that need to be turned.  (Angel and I discuss this in detail in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
  25. Start embracing the lessons life is teaching you. – Everything that happens helps you grow.  Sometimes painful experiences teach us priceless life lessons we didn’t think we needed to know.  If you’re having problems, that’s good.  It means you’re making progress.  The only people with no problems are the ones doing nothing.
  26. Start measuring your progress every day, no matter how small. – You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.  You may not be where you want to be yet, but look how far you’ve come, and be grateful that you’re not stuck where you once were.
  27. Start embracing the uncertainty in front of you. – Don’t let not knowing how it’ll end keep you from beginning.  Uncertainty chases us out into the open where life’s true magic is waiting.

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6/23/2014

How to get Happy


  • Happy people:
    • They devote a great amount of time to their family and friends, nurturing and enjoying those 
    • relationships.
    • They are comfortable expressing gratitude for all they have.
    • They are often the first to offer helping hands to coworkers and passersby.
    • They practice optimism when imagining their futures.
    • They savor life’s pleasures and try to live in the present moment.
    • They make physical exercise a weekly and even daily habit.
    • They are deeply committed to lifelong goals and ambitions (e.g., fighting fraud, building 
    • cabinets, or teaching their children their deeply held values).
    • Last but not least, the happiest people do have their share of stresses, crises, and even 
    • tragedies. They may become just as distressed and emotional in such circumstances as you or I, 
    • but their secret weapon is the poise and strength they show in coping in the face of challenge
    or,
  • 1. Practice mindfulness. Be in the moment. Instead of worrying about your checkup tomorrow 
  • while you have dinner with your family, focus on the here and now — the food, the company, the 
  • conversation.

  • 2. Laugh out loud. Just anticipating a happy, funny event can raise levels of endorphins and 
  • other pleasure-inducing hormones and lower production of stress hormones. Researchers at the 
  • University of California, Irvine, tested 16 men who all agreed they thought a certain videotape 
  • was funny. Half were told three days in advance they would watch it. They started experiencing 
  • biological changes right away. When they actually watched the video, their levels of stress 
  • hormones dropped significantly, while their endorphin levels rose 27 percent and their growth 
  • hormone levels (indicating benefit to the immune system) rose 87 percent.

  • 3. Go to sleep. We have become a nation of sleep-deprived citizens. Taking a daily nap or 
  • getting into bed at 8 p.m. one night with a good book — and turning the light out an hour later 
  • — can do more for your mood and outlook on life than any number of bubble baths or massages.

  • 4. Hum along. Music soothes more than the savage beast. Studies find music activates parts of 
  • the brain that produce happiness — the same parts activated by food or sex. It’s also relaxing. 
  • In one study older adults who listened to their choice of music during outpatient eye surgery 
  • had significantly lower heart rates, blood pressure, and cardiac workload (that is, their heart 
  • didn’t have to work as hard) as those who had silent surgery.

  • 5. Declutter. It’s nearly impossible to meditate, breathe deeply, or simply relax when every 
  • surface is covered with papers and bills and magazines, your cabinets bulge, and you haven’t 
  • balanced your checkbook in six months. Plus, the repetitive nature of certain cleaning tasks — 
  • such as sweeping, wiping, and scrubbing — can be meditative in and of itself if you focus on 
  • what you’re doing.

  • 6. Just say no. Eliminate activities that aren’t necessary and that you don’t enjoy. If there 
  • are enough people already to handle the church bazaar and you’re feeling stressed by the 
  • thought of running the committee for yet another year, step down and let someone else handle 
  • things.

  • 7. Make a list. There’s nothing like writing down your tasks to help you organize your thoughts 
  • and calm your anxiety. Checking off each item provides a great sense of fulfillment.

  • 8. Do one thing at a time. Edward Suarez, Ph.D., associate professor of medical psychology at 
  • Duke, found that people who multitask are more likely to have high blood pressure. Take that 
  • finding to heart. Instead of talking on the phone while you fold laundry or clean the kitchen, 
  • sit down in a comfortable chair and turn your entire attention over to the conversation. 
  • Instead of checking e-mail as you work on other projects, turn off your e-mail function until 
  • you finish the report you’re writing. This is similar to the concept of mindfulness.

  • 9. Garden. Not only will the fresh air and exercise provide their own stress reduction and 
  • feeling of well-being, but the sense of accomplishment that comes from clearing a weedy patch, 
  • watching seeds turn into flowers, or pruning out dead wood will last for hours, if not days.

  • 10. Tune out the news. For one week go without reading the newspaper, watching the news, or 
  • scanning the headlines online. Instead, take a vacation from the misery we’re exposed to every 
  • day via the media and use that time for a walk, a meditation session, or to write in your 
  • journal.



  • (Read more: www.rd.com/health/wellness/20-simple-ways-to-get-happy/#ixzz35RusQO3F)



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